Divorce asks a lot of parents. It asks you to keep making decisions with the person you're least able to talk to right now. That's hard. It's normal for it to feel impossible some days.
Here's what guides my work.
1. Kids at the center -- not in the middle
Children feel safest when the adults handle the adult problems. My first question is always: what does your child need from the two of you right now?
2. Conflict is the thing to work on
What weighs on kids most is ongoing conflict between parents. So we work on how you disagree -- not just what you disagree about.
3. Structure lowers the temperature
Clear agreements shrink the number of decisions that can turn into fights. When pickup time is already settled, there's nothing to argue about at 5:45 on a Friday.
4. Feelings need somewhere to go
Grief, anger, fear -- they don't disappear when the papers are signed. Sessions are a place to feel them out loud, so they don't leak into hand-offs or show up in front of the kids.
5. Under the fight, there's usually fear
Feeling threatened by the way your ex says or does something launches your brain into protection mode. That's when texts and tone get sharp. Drawing on attachment science, IFS, and a psychodynamic lens (looking at how old experiences shape today's reactions), we look at what gets triggered -- and why -- so you can respond instead of react.
6. Neutral, always
When I work with both parents, I don't take sides. I'm not there to decide who's right. I'm there to help you both find what works for your child.
You can't control your co-parent's behavior. You can choose how you respond -- and that alone can change a lot.
Meet Casey
I'm Casey Binstadt, LMFT. For over 10 years, I've worked with parents and couples through breakups, divorce, blended households, and coparenting. My approach is warm, practical, and focused on what your child needs most.
LMFT #50495 · Mosten Mediation Trained · 119 Ward Street, Larkspur · Telehealth across California